Getting to know all about you
The author of the Sherlock Holmes mysteries, Arthur Conan Doyle misled us. So have the writers of House, MD; Lie to me, Psyche and the Mentalist. What do they have in common? Okay, first point is a gimme; I enjoy these shows.
The other point is a bit more subtle. As an audience, we bought the idea some one’s slightest actions can be spun off to tell volumes about them. I forgot these shows have writers working full time to spin a story line around these connections. I also forgot how really bad human communications are even when they’re really good. Misunderstanding is the rule not the exception.
We can be forgiven if we think someone can be accurately understood after barely meeting them. A familiar drama story line has been pumping this nonsense into our brains since 1887.
Human understanding would be better if we knew someone for a time before judging them. Like the old Native American saying, “Do not judge someone until you’ve walked a mile in their moccasins.”
My wife, Lyn and I will be married 40 years this August, and I’m always learning something new about her. She is my standard for knowing another person. If I don’t know her after all this time, I don’t know anyone.
The real learning will takes decades more.